He gets a free meal, and to talk shit about a stranger on the internet. It’s some of his favorite things combined. Today is a good day. He has a skip in his step as he strolls to the diner, humming some cutesy pop tune under his breath.
He gets to the diner. Sees Chipp. He stands in front of him.
And he’s very proud that his smile doesn’t budge.]
Excuse me, my helmeted friend, would you know of a stupid, soft stranger who may have entered this diner? No?
[Sorry, Kagami, that ain't gonna work! Unfortunately, this big guy also has grabbing and lifting magic -- But unlike Purple's, it's less gentle. Less graceful. All the power and force of a magnet hefting Kagami back in front of him.]
Where you think you goin', bougre? I told you I'm payin' for your wholeass meal - you ain't gonna skip out on that, are ya?
[... That's French for "buddy" and/or "bastard". Depends on the tone.]
[... Despite all that, though, the lady at the front gets a polite thanks and a big, LED smile from him as he accepts a pair of menus. It's a whole demeanor change - warm and inviting as he leads Kagami through the building over to his usual booth. He even helps Kagami into his seat, takes his cloak off and sits across from the other before handing him a menu -
And then lifts a leg to slam the sole of his boot against the seat beside Kagami, pinning him in. No leaving allowed.]
How 'bout this - An entree, two sides, a drink, and a treat. Might as well go whole hog, right...?
[Kagami’s petty comment dies in a grunt as he’s so rudely shoved through the door.
But he’s not annoyed. Nope. Not him. He’s all coy smiles and gentle pleasantries as he’s helped in his seat. He’s very proud of himself for not flinching when the boot pins him in, pretending to eye the menu at a leisurely pace.]
Wow, so generous! If I get a treat, then…can my treat be the whole menu?!
Cute, kid. Real cute. Your treat is somethin' off the dessert menu.
[Meanwhile, Chipp's got his own menu open as well... but he's probably just gonna get himself a black coffee. This isn't about him, after all. It's about Kagami. :)]
Save it for folks your own age, hun. I don't do flings with anklebiters.
[... Sorry, Kagami. It's the cute babyface; he has a hard time actually pinpointing someone's age, so he errs on the side of caution. That said - Once the waitress makes her way to their table, Chipp puts in an order for the both of them - as politely as possible, of course. Even calls her "ma'am". And after she walks away...]
... You ain't the type to give out your name, huh? I get that. Names are powerful.
Call me Chipp. Ain't gonna call you any o' that, though; I already got me a "cherie", if you wanna get all cheesy 'bout it. How 'bout I call you, eh... Lapin? Since you think you such a li'l trickster.
[Sing-songed with a smile. He waves at the waitress as she leaves, cheerful as ever, and turns his attention back to Chipp, chin resting in his hands.]
Chipp...?
[Oh! His eyes widen in recognition, but he doesn't say anything. Not outright.]
Do you now? What's your cherie like? Are they a willowly, sophisticated and captivating brunette with the best sex ideas? Or are they a ridiculously hot disaster of a horny doctor who freaks out about his own l--
Maybe not, but you sure sound like you get down like one if that's your opinion of Nenett.
[Yeah. Nenett. He's got a special nickname for them and everything. It's... also not hard to guess that that's who Kagami means, considering their whole thing about sex. Safe to say they're good at keeping Chipp very busy whenever it's just the two of them--]
... Ain't too far off about Shigeru, though. Love the guy, bless'im, but he could use some pointers in charisma.
[Kagami blushes as if scandalized, but he looks absolutely delighted.]
Nenett? That’s so cute…! I need a cute nickname for them. And Shigeru is plenty charismatic, I find it quite charming when he panics. So, if you’re Chipp, I have a very important question to ask…
Wish you luck on comin' up with a good one, but ya can't take mine. Came up with it long before we made eyes at each other. Way back when we first showed up together... when all they knew was that fuckin' tower.
[For a second, he almost seems like he's about to get all melancholy - But no. Even if Kagami hadn't had asked that, it's not his style to mope around. At least, not while wearing his helmet. Kagami earns himself a little snort of amusement, a big, stupid grin on his LED screen.]
You know what they mean by that, don'tcha? Surely you speak their language by now if you think they so perfect, right?
Ouais, we did. You shoulda seen'em - Hunched over a snowbank, shovelin' handfuls of snow in they mouth like they were gonna shrivel up 'n die without it! Took'em out to get ice cream instead. Ended up showin'em a lotta different foods 'n stuff... If they ever make you that "peanut butter porridge" of theirs, 's kinda my fault for showin'em peanut butter. Sorry.
[All of this said with both pantomiming and that big grin still on his screen, of course. He feels that responds to a lot of what Kagami just said - both his question and his choice to believe Nen is perfect.
Because, well -]
... 'S important to remember they a person just like everyone else, though. Don't go thinkin' Nen is 100% perfect. That puts'em on a pedestal away from the rest of us - "other"s them in a bad way. Y'know? They wanna be included in stuff. In everything. Wouldn't you?
They did?! Were they alright? Their body temperature is already quite cool, I’d fear for their health if they were eating snow… Mn, but it’s so fun sharing peanut butter with them! I found them a huge tub of it once.
[Kagami smiles stupidly. It’s the smile of someone infatuated. He waves a hand and giggles.]
You needn’t worry about that. I’ve already screwed up with them once already. We only made it out alive because… Well, either way I have no delusions about their flaws. But I just find those quirks so endearing and that’s why they’re perfect! Don’t you?
Oh, pfft- 'course they were! I stopped'em 'fore they ate any dirty snow, gottem inside and warm. Then I bought'em treats. Like the peanut butter. They wanted somethin' close to their "nutrient paste" back at the tower... figured that was the closest thing, since it's full'a good proteins 'n shit. But that porridge... it's all fun 'n games 'til they ask you to eat they cookin'. It's just peanut butter and hot water.
[There's so much fondness in his voice - as to be expected, considering the topic - but it's definitely the kinda fondness that's offset a bit by his looks. Big guy, covered in all kinds of scars, prosthetic with a skull for a pauldron... you know.
He leans back, arms crossed, and seems to re-regard Kagami.]
... Y'know? This whole thing was gonna be about bein' real nice to you 'fore I broke all of your ribs, but I just can't stay mad at someone who's nice to Nenett. Even if you real obnoxious, 's clear you care about'em.
[Kagami hides his face, muffling his snickers and complete lack of fear of Chipp.]
You're so soft! And a poor judge of character. And I would eat anything Nenonen cooks, that sounds delicious. You're like a big, silly puppy, but luckily for you I do care about them! And I would do anything to make sure they're happy and safe.
Ain't that poor a judge. I can tell you a piece of shit who likes pissin' people off 'cause you think it's funny. Prolly got sticky fingers, too. Kids like you always do.
I just don't care. All that matters to me is that you make Nenett happy.
[It's at about this point that a server makes her way to their table, politely setting all the food in front of them both - It really is mostly for Kagami, but Chipp's gotten himself a coffee and a pair of powdered pastries regardless.]
[- It's only once she's gone again, though, that Chipp bothers to take off his helmet. So he'll even be able to eat in the first place. Even though that LED screen of his had a smile on it, his actual face does not. And his voice has nothing to it to match - When he speaks, it's coldly monotone.
(That's what the helmet's for, after all. To do everything he can't.)]
Funny you thinkin' of me like a puppy, though. Folks back in the land of the livin' used to call me the Watchdog.
There you go, assuming my age again. You shouldn't talk that way to someone who could be your elder.
[But that doesn't stop Kagami from smiling blithely when the waitress appears with all his food. A burger, a side of loaded fries, another side of mac and cheese, a sundae with sprinkles and soda--
Before he can dig in, Chipp has removed his helmet. Kagami "oohs" as obnoxiously as possible, leaning over the table for a better look.]
Even if you older than me, I'm still gonna call you a kid. If ya don't like it, stop actin' like a kid.
[Sorry, Kagami... this applies to everyone, though. Even people back home get this treatment. That helmet's getting placed in the seat beside him, though, so he can at least start with that coffee.]
To be honest, I dunno 'zactly what they meant by it. Watchdog of the people, I guess. I got rid of a lotta stains in society - law enforcement hated me for it.
Nenett's got a book on the whole thing if you care about it.
[Well, plate of pancakes on the way!! Chipp also seems unbothered by that request - even taking up the table's dripper full of maple syrup and putting it in front of Kagami.]
Naw. No magic involved - just a good ol' biased biography written by a lucky journalist who got to see me 'fore the state put me down like a dog.
[a lot of people keep forgetting to tell Kagami they're dead, huh]
... Lotta my targets were the uppity-ups who had the funds to keep the law off their backs. Folks who could pay their way through the system and get away with some real nasty shit. Somethin' tells me you get what I mean 'bout it.
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no subject
He gets a free meal, and to talk shit about a stranger on the internet. It’s some of his favorite things combined. Today is a good day. He has a skip in his step as he strolls to the diner, humming some cutesy pop tune under his breath.
He gets to the diner. Sees Chipp. He stands in front of him.
And he’s very proud that his smile doesn’t budge.]
Excuse me, my helmeted friend, would you know of a stupid, soft stranger who may have entered this diner? No?
Okay, thanks for letting me know~!
[Time to leave…!]
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But unlike Purple's, it's less gentle. Less graceful. All the power and force of a magnet hefting Kagami back in front of him.]
Where you think you goin', bougre? I told you I'm payin' for your wholeass meal - you ain't gonna skip out on that, are ya?
[... That's French for "buddy" and/or "bastard". Depends on the tone.]
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Kagami smooths out his peeved expression with a pleasant smile. A smile is always more infuriating than showing any annoyance. Time to play dumb.]
Eh?! You're the softy? Now that you mention it...yep, I never would have found you intimidating at all!
Very well, monsieur, I look forward to being treated like royalty~
1/2; welcome to hell kagami :')
If there is anything a Louisiana boy's good at... it's treatin' you like royalty.
[That is not a threat, it's a promise.
One he makes good on immediately by just... outrightly shoving Kagami through the diner's door.]
2/2;
It's a whole demeanor change - warm and inviting as he leads Kagami through the building over to his usual booth.
He even helps Kagami into his seat, takes his cloak off and sits across from the other before handing him a menu -
And then lifts a leg to slam the sole of his boot against the seat beside Kagami, pinning him in.
No leaving allowed.]
How 'bout this -
An entree, two sides, a drink, and a treat. Might as well go whole hog, right...?
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[Kagami’s petty comment dies in a grunt as he’s so rudely shoved through the door.
But he’s not annoyed. Nope. Not him. He’s all coy smiles and gentle pleasantries as he’s helped in his seat. He’s very proud of himself for not flinching when the boot pins him in, pretending to eye the menu at a leisurely pace.]
Wow, so generous! If I get a treat, then…can my treat be the whole menu?!
[He claps his hands together.]
And all your thoughts and fears, of course.
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Your treat is somethin' off the dessert menu.
[Meanwhile, Chipp's got his own menu open as well... but he's probably just gonna get himself a black coffee.
This isn't about him, after all. It's about Kagami. :)]
You gotta name you wanna tell me?
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[He smirks at Chipp shamelessly.]
A burger sounds nice. And some sides…? And you can call me many names! Cherie or ange for example…
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[... Sorry, Kagami. It's the cute babyface; he has a hard time actually pinpointing someone's age, so he errs on the side of caution.
That said -
Once the waitress makes her way to their table, Chipp puts in an order for the both of them - as politely as possible, of course. Even calls her "ma'am".
And after she walks away...]
... You ain't the type to give out your name, huh? I get that.
Names are powerful.
Call me Chipp. Ain't gonna call you any o' that, though; I already got me a "cherie", if you wanna get all cheesy 'bout it.
How 'bout I call you, eh... Lapin? Since you think you such a li'l trickster.
nsfw sexual themes (1/2)
[Sing-songed with a smile. He waves at the waitress as she leaves, cheerful as ever, and turns his attention back to Chipp, chin resting in his hands.]
Chipp...?
[Oh! His eyes widen in recognition, but he doesn't say anything. Not outright.]
Do you now? What's your cherie like? Are they a willowly, sophisticated and captivating brunette with the best sex ideas? Or are they a ridiculously hot disaster of a horny doctor who freaks out about his own l--
2/2
Lapin???]
Do I look like a fucking rabbit to you?
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[Yeah. Nenett. He's got a special nickname for them and everything. It's... also not hard to guess that that's who Kagami means, considering their whole thing about sex.
Safe to say they're good at keeping Chipp very busy whenever it's just the two of them--]
... Ain't too far off about Shigeru, though. Love the guy, bless'im, but he could use some pointers in charisma.
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[Kagami blushes as if scandalized, but he looks absolutely delighted.]
Nenett? That’s so cute…! I need a cute nickname for them. And Shigeru is plenty charismatic, I find it quite charming when he panics. So, if you’re Chipp, I have a very important question to ask…
Is your butt truly a fractal?
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Way back when we first showed up together... when all they knew was that fuckin' tower.
[For a second, he almost seems like he's about to get all melancholy -
But no. Even if Kagami hadn't had asked that, it's not his style to mope around.
At least, not while wearing his helmet. Kagami earns himself a little snort of amusement, a big, stupid grin on his LED screen.]
You know what they mean by that, don'tcha? Surely you speak their language by now if you think they so perfect, right?
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[Kagami doesn’t react to the tower, although his stare becomes more calculating and he doesn’t sound…quite as upbeat.]
Well, they are perfect. It’s not really about what I think. But judging by your calves…mn, I think their assessment is accurate.
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Hunched over a snowbank, shovelin' handfuls of snow in they mouth like they were gonna shrivel up 'n die without it!
Took'em out to get ice cream instead. Ended up showin'em a lotta different foods 'n stuff...
If they ever make you that "peanut butter porridge" of theirs, 's kinda my fault for showin'em peanut butter. Sorry.
[All of this said with both pantomiming and that big grin still on his screen, of course.
He feels that responds to a lot of what Kagami just said - both his question and his choice to believe Nen is perfect.
Because, well -]
... 'S important to remember they a person just like everyone else, though. Don't go thinkin' Nen is 100% perfect.
That puts'em on a pedestal away from the rest of us - "other"s them in a bad way. Y'know?
They wanna be included in stuff. In everything.
Wouldn't you?
no subject
[Kagami smiles stupidly. It’s the smile of someone infatuated. He waves a hand and giggles.]
You needn’t worry about that. I’ve already screwed up with them once already. We only made it out alive because… Well, either way I have no delusions about their flaws. But I just find those quirks so endearing and that’s why they’re perfect! Don’t you?
no subject
Then I bought'em treats. Like the peanut butter. They wanted somethin' close to their "nutrient paste" back at the tower... figured that was the closest thing, since it's full'a good proteins 'n shit.
But that porridge... it's all fun 'n games 'til they ask you to eat they cookin'.
It's just peanut butter and hot water.
[There's so much fondness in his voice - as to be expected, considering the topic - but it's definitely the kinda fondness that's offset a bit by his looks.
Big guy, covered in all kinds of scars, prosthetic with a skull for a pauldron... you know.
He leans back, arms crossed, and seems to re-regard Kagami.]
... Y'know?
This whole thing was gonna be about bein' real nice to you 'fore I broke all of your ribs, but I just can't stay mad at someone who's nice to Nenett.
Even if you real obnoxious, 's clear you care about'em.
no subject
[Kagami hides his face, muffling his snickers and complete lack of fear of Chipp.]
You're so soft! And a poor judge of character. And I would eat anything Nenonen cooks, that sounds delicious. You're like a big, silly puppy, but luckily for you I do care about them! And I would do anything to make sure they're happy and safe.
Anything. Literally anything.
1/2; yet againnn
Prolly got sticky fingers, too. Kids like you always do.
I just don't care. All that matters to me is that you make Nenett happy.
[It's at about this point that a server makes her way to their table, politely setting all the food in front of them both -
It really is mostly for Kagami, but Chipp's gotten himself a coffee and a pair of powdered pastries regardless.]
2/2;
Even though that LED screen of his had a smile on it, his actual face does not. And his voice has nothing to it to match -
When he speaks, it's coldly monotone.
(That's what the helmet's for, after all. To do everything he can't.)]
Funny you thinkin' of me like a puppy, though. Folks back in the land of the livin' used to call me the Watchdog.
no subject
[But that doesn't stop Kagami from smiling blithely when the waitress appears with all his food. A burger, a side of loaded fries, another side of mac and cheese, a sundae with sprinkles and soda--
Before he can dig in, Chipp has removed his helmet. Kagami "oohs" as obnoxiously as possible, leaning over the table for a better look.]
That wasn't your face?! Watchdog of what, hm?
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If ya don't like it, stop actin' like a kid.
[Sorry, Kagami... this applies to everyone, though. Even people back home get this treatment.
That helmet's getting placed in the seat beside him, though, so he can at least start with that coffee.]
To be honest, I dunno 'zactly what they meant by it. Watchdog of the people, I guess.
I got rid of a lotta stains in society - law enforcement hated me for it.
Nenett's got a book on the whole thing if you care about it.
no subject
[Kagami tries to get the waitress's attention to ask for a plate of pancakes.]
No real loss there! Law enforcement are pretty useless. Is it some kind of weird magic books that captured your memories or something to that effect?
... i need more helmetless icons
Naw. No magic involved - just a good ol' biased biography written by a lucky journalist who got to see me 'fore the state put me down like a dog.
[a lot of people keep forgetting to tell Kagami they're dead, huh]
... Lotta my targets were the uppity-ups who had the funds to keep the law off their backs. Folks who could pay their way through the system and get away with some real nasty shit.
Somethin' tells me you get what I mean 'bout it.
needing more icons is a mood
why must icons be so hard 🥺
T_T right why can't they just magically appear when we want them
if only i had such a power!!!!
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